May - June 2018

 1. Riding Around Jer Ben 在知本騎摩托車 (May 2018)

Jer Ben is about 20 minutes south of downtown Taitung.  In administrative terms, most of it is within the Taitung City limits, though parts closer to the hot spring area are actually in Beinan Township.  從台東市區到知本開車要20分鐘左右.  在行政區的劃分中知本算是在台東市內, 可是比較靠近溫泉區的地方實際上是卑南鄉.


If you're travelling south on Highway 11, eventually you'll come to a sign announcing Jer Ben, just before the bridge that crosses the Jer Ben River.  If you take a left before the bridge, you'll wind up in a weird "no man's land" near the ocean.  The Taitung County Government wants to build a solar power facility in this area, though I couldn't see any signs of construction.  台11線往南, 你會看到知本的標示牌.  這個路牌在還沒過知本溪的那座橋前面.  如果你在橋前左轉的話, 你會來到一個靠海的奇怪且無主的空地.  台東縣政府有在這裡蓋太陽能發電設施的計畫, 可是我在這裡沒有看到什麼工程標示牌.


Jer Ben also has its own train station, though the station is far from where most people in Jer Ben actually live.  This picture is looking north, towards Taitung City.  知本也有火車站, 可是火車站離市區有點遠.  這張照片朝北邊往台東市看的.



Turning right off Highway 11, you head up a hill into "downtown" Jer Ben.  The only noteworthy thing on this road is the Hei Song Goat Pot restaurant, which is pretty good.  But of course it's summer now, and who wants to eat goat pot when it's so hot?  離開台11線右轉就是往知本市區.  這條路上唯一值得注意的只有好吃的黑松羊肉爐.  可是炎熱的夏天來臨時誰想吃羊肉爐?


Finding the hot springs the first time can be tricky, but if you see this 7-11, you know you're headed in the right direction.  See that blue truck?  The hot springs are up that road.  很多人第一次找溫泉區的時候就迷路了.  但是看到這家Seven的時候, 你就知道你走對方向了.  看到藍色的卡車嗎?  去溫泉就往那條路走.



There are more forested areas as you approach the hot springs.  Watch out for snakes!  溫泉區的森林地比較大.  小心蛇!


This entire complex is for rent.  I'm sure they want a ridiculous amount of money for it, but I can't imagine a cooler place to live.  The parties would be epic!  這個地方出租.  應該要不少錢, 我覺得住在這裡應該很棒.  可以舉辦最好的party.


And this is the view from their front porch.  這是他們看台上的風景.



There's some light farming going on in the hills around here, but nothing as extensive as you'd see in Tai Ma Li Township, to the south.  在山坡上有些農夫種菜, 可是這裡的農地比南邊的太麻里小很多.


This is the hot spring area, on the Jer Ben River.  At the other end of this valley is the Jer Ben Forest Recreation Area.  這是知本溪上的溫泉區.  山谷的另外一邊是知本森林遊樂區.



They've been digging up the river bed quite a bit.  The ducks love it here.  他們一直在挖知本溪的河床.  附近的鴨子很喜歡.


Looking the other way, toward the ocean.  The river mouth is where Highway 11 merges into Highway 9.  This is also the boundary between Taitung City and Tai Ma Li Township.  往海的方向看.  這是溪口, 也是台11線和台9線連接的地方.  這裡也是台東市和太麻里鄉的邊界.



One of Tu Di Gong (the "Earth God")'s many temples.  土地公廟.


Further up the valley.  The Royal Formosa, Dong Tai, and A Ya Wang hot springs are all further up the left bank.  往山谷走.  老爺, 東台和ㄚ一ㄚ旺溫泉都在左邊的溪岸.


Highway 9, on the way back home.  The Pacific Ocean is just beyond the trees.  It was a hot, hot day, and I have the sunburn to prove it.  回家路上的台9線.  太平洋在樹林後面.  那一天的天氣很熱.  我都曬紅了!

2. 生活 "Life" 1 第一單元跟第二單元 Unit One and Unit Two 上 First Semester (May 2018)

For a general overview of these textbooks and how they're used in Taiwanese elementary schools, refer to Elementary School in Taiwan: Overview of Classes and Textbooks Used.

The "Life" textbook is the precursor to both Social Studies and (Natural) Science, which elementary school students study in grade 3.  This textbook is also used (or at least mentioned) in their "Living Arts" class.

This format used is more like that of a picture book.  The "Girl 1," "Boy 1," etc. refers to the text found in word balloons.


第一單元: 開學了 Unit 1: School Starts

開學了 School Starts

這是我們的學校, 我們可以在這裡學習和遊戲.  This is our school, we can learn and play here.

1. 到學校 Arriving at School

上小學了, 新學校有什麼不一樣嗎? [You've] started elementary school, is there anything different about your new school?

Girl 1: 你在哪一班? What class are you in?

Boy 1: 哇!  好大呵!  Wa!  So big!

Girl 2 and Boy 2: 老師早! Good morning teacher!

Boy 3: 一年級和幼稚園還有哪些不一樣呢?  What other differences are there between first grade and kindergarten?

2. 下課了 Break Time

下課時間大家都在做什麼呢? What is everyone doing during break time?

Girl 1: 你怎麼了? Are you ok?

Boy 1: 我想媽媽. I miss my mother.

Girl 2: 老師你好忙呵! Teacher you are so busy!

Girl 3: 啊! Ah!

Boy 2: 我洗好了! I'm finished washing!

Boy 3: 有人受傷了, 怎麼辦呢? Someone is hurt, what can we do?

Boy 4: 好多人在活動, 怎麼才能避免受傷呢? So many people are moving around, how can we keep people from getting hurt?

Girl 4: 姐姐, 放學後一起回家呵! Big sister, let's go home together after school!

Boy 4: 下課時, 大家可以做自己想做的事, 真開心! During break time everyone can do what they like.  [We are] very happy!

3. 認識新同學 Making New Friends

班上有好多同學,要怎麼認識他們呢? There are many classmates [in your class], how can you get to know them?

Boy 1: 一起去玩好嗎? Do you want to play together?

Girl 1: 謝謝! Thanks!

猜拳歌 Paper, Scissors, Stone Song

孫素意 Suen Su-Yi 詞 Words
作曲者不詳 Music Unknown

小朋友我們行個禮, Kids line up,
握握手呀來猜拳, Shake hands "ah!" and try to guess,
石碰怕呀看誰贏, The rock hits "pa ya!" see who wins,
輸了就要跟我走. The loser needs to walk with me.

Boy 1: 你記得和哪些同學猜過拳嗎? Which classmates did you remember to play [sing] with?

跟著大鼓, 小鼓的聲音踏踏步.  Step in time with the sound of the big drum and the small drum.

Girl 1: 我好想認識更多同學! I would love to know even more classmates!

要怎麼認識新朋友呢? How can you make a new friend?

找一找, 誰和你喜歡的事物一樣呢?  Look around.  Who likes the same things as you?

Boy 1: 我是李小明, 我和你一樣愛吃西瓜.  I'm Li Shiao-ming.  I like watermelon, same as you.

你可以試試看 You Can Try It

1. 把8開圖畫紙對摺成兩面畫紙. Take size 8 construction paper and fold it in half.

2. 先在其中一面畫出自己喜歡的活動. On one half draw activities you like.

3. 然後在另一面畫出喜歡的事物. Afterward, draw things you like on the other half.

Girl 1: 完成了! Finished!

你認識了幾個新朋友?  想和他們一起去做什麼呢? How many new friends have you made?  What do you want to do with them?

我的朋友在哪裡 Where is My Friend?

林福欲 Lin Fu-yu 填詞 Lyrics
美國民歌 American Folk Song

一二三四五六七, One two three four five six seven,
 我的朋友在哪裡? Where is my friend?
在這裡, 在這裡, Here, here,
我的朋友在這裡. My friend is here.
啦啦啦啦啦啦啦, La la la la la la la,
同唱歌來同遊戲. Sing and play together.
笑嘻嘻, 多甜蜜, Laughter is very sweet,
我的朋友就是你. My friend is you.

Boy 1: 我好喜歡天天和新朋友一起玩! I love to play with my new friends every day!

第二單元: 校園大發現 Unit 2: Discovering the School Campus

校園就像一座大寶藏, 等著我們去發現呵!  你準備好要出發了嗎?  The school campus is like a treasure, waiting for you to find it!  Are you ready to go outside?

1. 說說學校的事 Talking About School

你曾經去過校園裡的哪些地方呢?  發現過特別的事情嗎? Which places in the school have you been to?  What have you discovered?

Girl 1: 你是在哪裡發現這朵花的?  Where did you find this flower?

Girl 2: 我也想去那裡看一看!  帶我去! I also want to go there and see!  Take me there!

2. 一起去探索 Exploring Together

聽過同學的分享後, 你最想去校園哪些地方呢?  大家一起去探索吧!  After hearing what your classmates have shared, what places in the school would you like to visit?  Let's explore together!

Boy 1: 老師們在辦公室裡做什麼事呢? What do the teachers do in the office?

Boy 2: 您好! Hello sir!

教師辦公室 Teacher's Office

健康中心 Health Center

Girl 1: 我上次受傷就是來這裡擦藥的. Last time I was hurt I came here to have ointment rubbed on it.

Boy 3: 健康中心有一種特別的味道... The health center has a special smell...

Boy 4 [in wheelchair]: 這裡讓我上學和回家都很方便. This place makes it convenient for me to go back and forth from school.

無障礙坡道 Handicapped-Accessible Ramp


圖書館 Library

Girl 2: 大家在這裡做什麼呢? What is everyone doing in here?

Boy 5: 想一想, 上下樓梯時要注意什麼呢? Think about it, when going up and down the stairs what should we be careful of?

電腦教室 Computer Room

Girl 3: 哥哥說我們三年級就可以來這裡上課了! My big brother says that when we're in third grade we can attend class here!

到戶外去探索看看吧! Go outside and explore!

Boy 1: 我最喜歡玩溜滑梯! My favorite place to play is the slide!

Girl 1 [pointing under the slide]: 那裡是我的秘密基地. That's my secret place.

遊戲器材區 Playground

Boy 2: 戶外空間真大, 別人都在做什麼呢? It's so big outside, what is everyone else doing?

Boy 3: 怎樣玩遊戲才安全? How can we use the play equipment safely?

Girl 2: 明天我也要帶球來玩! Tomorrow I also want to bring a ball to play with!

Boy 4 [hanging on the chin-up bar]: 開心的玩一下吧! Let me play with this a second!

操場 Athletic Field

Boy 5 [gesturing to a series of children playing charades]: 別人在做什麼呢?  我們來模仿看看. What are other people doing? Let's try to act it out.

Girl 3: 除了用看的, 還可以怎樣探索校園呢? Aside from seeing, how else can we explore the school?

生態池 Ecological Pond

Girl 4: 我就是在這裡撿到這朵花的! I picked this flower here!

Boy 6 [holding a tree]: 摸起來粗粗的! It feels rough!

Boy 7: 你聽到什麼聲音? What do you hear?

Girl 5: 有好多小動物! There are so many small animals!

小麻雀 Little Sparrow

馮輝岳 Feng Huei-yue 詞 Lyrics
蔡鴻宜 Tsai Hong-yi 曲 Music

小麻雀唧唧喳, 一隻在唱歌, Little sparrow "ji ji ja," one sings a song,
一隻學說話, 唧唧喳唧唧喳, One learns to talk, "ji ji ja ji ji ja,"
下來吧!  下來陪我玩泥沙. Come down! Play in the sand with me.

Boy 8: 跟著小麻雀一起跳一跳吧! Jump along with the little sparrow!

到校園裡找一找掉落在地上的樹葉, 果實或花朵, 用它們來排成一幅圖畫.  Look for fallen leaves, fruit, or flowers around campus.  Arrange them to make a picture.

Boy 8: 圖畫完成後, 拍照做紀念, 記得要把樹葉, 果實或花朵放回去呵! After you've finished your picture, take a picture as a memento.  Remember to put the leaves, fruit, and flowers back!

你還想去哪些地方探索?  和誰一起去?  去做什麼呢? What other places would you like to explore?  Who do you want to go with?  What will you do there?

Boy 9: 我們找另一條路回教室吧! Let's go back to class another way!

Girl 6: 你知道學校的兔子養在哪裡嗎? Do you know where the school rabbit is?

Boy 10: 我知道!  我帶妳去! I know!  I will take you!

Boy 11: 下課時, 你要不要跟我去大樹下玩? During break time, do you want to play with me under the big tree?

3. 校園裡最喜歡的地方 [Your] Favorite Place in School

你最喜歡校園哪個地方呢?  What's your favorite place in school?

Girl 1: 我喜歡大樹下. I like it best under the big tree.

Boy 1: 我喜歡圖書館. I like the library the most.

Boy 2 [holding his picture]: 這是我用樹葉拼成的. I made this out of leaves.

你可以試試看 You Can Try It

1. 撕一撕色紙, 看一看像校園中的哪一個景物? Tear up colored paper, see what things in the school it resembles.

2. 在色紙背面四周塗上膠水. Spread glue on the other side of the paper.

3. 黏在圖畫紙上, 再用粉蠟筆完成作品. Glue it onto construction paper, use crayons to finish the picture.

Girl 1: 完成了! I finished!

3. Mountains, South Taiwan 台灣南部的山景 (May 2018)

Some pictures I took while driving along the Southern Cross-Island Highway 南迴公路, Highway 165 (屏165), and Highway 199 between Taitung 台東 and Pingtung 屏東 Counties 縣.

These first few were taken along the Southern Cross-Island Highway.




The winding road below is the new Southern Cross-Island Highway, which will pass through a tunnel on its way to Pingtung County.  It will be a long time before this road is finished.





Highway 165/She Shing Road.  This road passes through Kenting National Park 墾丁國家公園.  It's a lot drier here.




Highway 199, looking down on Mudan Village 牡丹村.  That's the dam 水庫 to the right.



Highway 199 again, near Ku Chi Lake 哭泣湖.



4. A Few Pictures of Kenting 墾丁 (May 2018)

I was in Kenting 墾丁 last weekend, and I took these pictures.  This is Kenting's main street 墾丁大街, early in the morning.


Looking in the other direction.


Up the hill, toward Kenting National Park 墾丁國家公園.



Masked palm civet 白鼻心.  Car?  Rabies?  Old age?  No way to know!


Creek near He Ping Lane 和平巷.  This water flows down from Kenting National Park, so it's probably very clean.






5. She Ding Nature Park 社頂自然公園 (May 2018)

She Ding Nature Park is inside Kenting National Park 墾丁國家公園.  It's 5 km up the hill from Kenting's main street 墾丁大街 along Highway 165.

It was damn hot when we were there, but I really enjoyed the walk. 

















6. "Lamay Island" 小琉球 / 琉球與 (May 2018)


If you treat Lamay Island as more of a journey. and less of a destination, you'll probably be satisfied with it.  Let's say, for example, that you're driving through Pingtung 屏東, and you see signs for the Lamay Island Ferry.  "Hey, let's go check that out," you say, "I've never been there before!"

If, however, you're looking for a romantic getaway, or some kind of "island adventure," then you're going to be disappointed by Lamay Island.



I'm not even sure that "Lamay Island" is the right name for it.  Does it even have an official English name?  Everyone I know just calls it "shiao liou chiou 小琉球," which translated literally means "little Ryukyu."*  I saw the words "Lamay Island" on a couple of homestays there, but the Chinese article on Wikipedia states that "Western people 西方人" referred to it as either "Lambey" or "Lamey" Island.  This same article states that the Siraya Tribe 西拉雅族 were the island's earliest residents.  Maybe "Lamay" is from their language?

However it got its name, you get there from Dong Gang 東港 in Pingtung County.  Dong Gang is a little south of Kaohsiung 高雄, and just north of Da Peng Bay 大鵬灣.

We weren't able to park near the ferry terminal.  On that particular Saturday the terminal was CRAZY with tourists, so we ended up following a tour company's bus to their private parking lot.  At the parking lot we payed for our entire trip through the tour company, and I'm thinking there are probably cheaper options available.  This was the list of fees and the ferry schedule on their wall:



For those who don't read "small" (not to mention Chinese), the fee schedule above states that a round-trip boat ticket and scooter rental is 550 NT.  They add 50 NT to that sum on three and four-day weekends.  You can also add on guided activities like snorkeling, glass-bottom boat rides, and guided tours for extra money.  Most annoying of all, the more scenic and/or historic attractions have all been designated "scenic areas 風景區," and require an additional fee.  If you pay another 100 NT at this tour company, you won't need to pay to get into those places while you're on the island.

As you can see from the picture at the right, the first boat leaves from Dong Gang at 7:30 am, and the last boat leaves Lamay Island at 5:30 pm.  It takes about a half hour to get to the island, and the boat we went on was very comfortable.



This is the place where people buy/claim tickets and wait for the ferry.  When we were there it was total chaos.  There's nowhere to sit down, and much of the wait is outside, on the dock.


That bridge in the background is Highway 17 台17線.  As you can see, the wait for the boat can get a bit hot.  The white boats are run by another tour company, and may charge different fees.


After thirty minutes we could see the island.  My first reaction?  "Wow, that's really small."


Compared to Green Island 綠島, there's not much to do on Lamay Island.  Compared to Orchid Island 蘭嶼, there's not much nature.  Going to Orchid Island feels like leaving Taiwan, whereas Lamay Island feels very Taiwanese.


This is "downtown" Lamay Island.  Homestays, homestays, and more homestays.  More homestays, I suspect, than actual people actually resident on the island.


I still don't understand why someone would feel the need to get on a tour bus here.  We rode around the island in a matter of minutes.


There are many old houses on the island.  I'm guessing that in the "old sleepy days" most people were fishermen, and this is the type of house where they would have lived.  Nowadays they build pretentious-looking homestays and restaurants.


There are some decent views on the west side of the island (the side away from Dong Gang), but the scenery is few and far between.  More than anything this place reminded me of another island I visited near Pattaya, Thailand.


I was told that Lamay Island was Taiwan's largest coral atoll.  I'm still not sure if this is true, but it seems likely.  I still can't figure out why there are so many temples there.  


This is the view from the hill above "downtown."  It was hot, we'd been there long enough, and it was time to go back.  

So would I go back to Lamay Island?  Not likely.  Living not far from Fu Gang 富岡, Green and Orchid Islands are both more convenient and more fun destinations for me.  If you live in South or Central Taiwan, however, you might find it worth your while to go there.  Even so, a lot of the beach/nature activities possible on Lamay Island are both better and more convenient around Kenting 墾丁.

7. Stuff That I Like 我喜歡的一些東西 (June 2018)

You know what I like?  I like the sunshine.  When everyone's complaining about the heat, I just think about how good it is not to be in dark, gloomy Seattle, where people drink overpriced coffee just to keep themselves awake.  I like wearing shorts to work, and I like getting sunburned on the weekends.  I like mild winters, and not having to wait too long to go swimming.  Sunshine is great.  你知道我喜歡什麼嗎?  我喜歡陽光.  當大家都在抱怨天氣太熱的時候, 我就想只要不是在陰暗的西雅圖就好, 不用跟那邊的人一樣喝很貴的咖啡只為了保持清醒.  我喜歡穿短褲上班, 我也喜歡在周末把自己曬紅.  我喜歡比較溫暖的冬天, 短短冬季過後也不用等很久就可以去游泳了.  陽光很讚.

You know what other thing I like?  I like not being afraid of the police.  In the States you're never sure about the police, because maybe you did something illegal, or maybe the officer you're dealing with is suffering from some post-Iraq PTSD.  I enjoy being able to TALK to police officers, and I enjoy not feeling like they're going to shoot me and/or imprison me if I get out of line.  你知道我還喜歡什麼嗎?  我喜歡不怕警察的感覺.  在美國我們比較怕警察, 因為有可能沒注意到做的事情是違法的, 或是在你面前的那位警察有點精神狀況.  我喜歡可以跟這裡的警察講話, 不用害怕他們會開槍射我, 還是隨便把我丟進去監獄.

Another thing I like?  Good food.  And Taiwan has a lot of good food, no matter what certain (snobbish) people will tell you.  I like eating Vietnamese sandwiches at night markets, having hot pot at upscale restaurants, and trying local specialties.  A lot of people complain that the food here is "oily" or "dirty," but I think that's a lot of nonsense.  No one's making anyone eat oily or dirty food, and there are plenty of other options available.  我還喜歡什麼?  美食.  不管某些人說什麼, 台灣的好料理真的很多.  我喜歡在夜市吃越式三明治, 在高級餐廳吃火鍋, 在所有的地區吃他們的特產.  很多人會說這裡的食物太油膩或是很髒, 可是我覺得說這種話沒有意義.  沒有人強迫你吃油膩還是很髒的食物, 你還有很多其他的選擇.

I also like people who end meetings on time.  I like people who are able to both contribute to a meeting and remain aware of the clock.  I think it shows respect for everyone present when you can end a meeting when it's supposed to end.  It shows that you respect both your time and theirs.  我也喜歡準時結束會議的人.  我喜歡可以一邊有效地進行會議, 一邊注意到時間的人.  我想準時把會議結束就是一種尊重他人的行為.  這樣子大家知道你珍視他們的時間, 也珍視自己的時間.

I even like snakes.  I think snakes are fascinating animals.  Most people see them and freak out, but I think that as long as you're aware of them they're no problem.  For me snakes aren't even half as scary as monkeys.  You never know what monkeys are going to do.  我連蛇都喜歡.  我覺得蛇很有趣.  大部分的人看到牠們就很害怕, 可是我覺得你只要注意到牠們出現的地方就沒有問題.  猴子比較可怕.  因為永遠看不出來猴子的下一個行動.

I like it when people get worked up over local elections.  I like it when parents of students say hello to me on the street.  I like taking the MRT around Taipei.  I like driving down strange mountain roads.  I like temples dedicated to unusual gods.  I like eating rice with every meal, and I like tables loaded with stir-fried goodness.  我喜歡當地人民努力參加當地的選舉活動.  我喜歡學生的家長在校外跟我打招呼.  我喜歡在台北坐捷運.  我喜歡走奇怪的山路.  我喜歡較沒名氣的神明的廟.  我喜歡吃白飯配菜, 也喜歡餐桌擺滿炒好的料理.

Wherever we are, and whatever we're doing, there are always so many things to like.  Or maybe "enjoy" is a better word?  A lot of people will think you're strange for liking certain things, but the more there is to enjoy, the happier you'll be.  There can be a sense of community in complaining together, but people are also very good at making each other miserable.  Maybe it's better to focus on the positive?  到處都有令人喜歡的東西... 還是說 "欣賞" 比說 "喜歡" 好?  很多人會認為你喜歡的一些東西很奇怪, 可是有愈多值得欣賞的東西也會讓你更開心.  跟其他人一起批評某事會產生團體感, 可是一起討論讓人心煩的事也會讓心情更煩.  還是重視光明的那一面比較好吧!

Yes, liking things is good, and finding new things to like is even better.  有喜歡的東西是一件好事沒錯.  而找到新的喜歡的東西更好.

8. "Gloves," or Words to That Effect (June 2018)

The one word in Chinese I will never, ever forget is 手套 (shou tao) or "gloves."  

I forget many other words of course.  I forget words all the time.  But if there's one word that I will always remember - even into late-stage Alzheimer's - it will be 手套.

Before entering into my mighty struggle with 手套, I was familiar with handful of other words.  你好 (ni hao or "hello") as you'd expect, also 謝謝 (shie shie or "thanks").  Yet 手套 was the first word I tried to say correctly every time, and also the first word I had real difficulty with.

I have a clear memory of riding a scooter with my wife in Taichung 台中.  We were leaving a bus station when I innocently asked how to say "gloves" in Chinese.

"手套," she answered.

I couldn't hear it then, but she spoke the first word with a falling/rising tone, and the second with a falling tone.  I'd only been in Taiwan for a few months, and the tonal differences between words went over my head every time.

"Shou tao," I repeated in two, perfectly flat tones.

"No, that's not right," she corrected me, "Say it like I do - 手套."

"Shou tao," I said a second time, succeeding with the first character, but failing on the second.

"Still not right," she said patiently.  "手套..."

We continued on like this for twenty minutes or so, while I grew more and more frustrated with the Chinese language, with what I falsely perceived as her "patronizing attitude," and with the feeling of alienation that such exchanges produce.  By the end of those twenty minutes I was still no closer to being able to correctly pronounce 手套, and my wife, sensing my obvious frustration, decided to change the subject.

Naturally I, being the pain in the ass that I am, refused to let the torture stop there.  I had a bee in my bonnet about "people saying things about me that I can't understand," and I was determined to know enough Chinese to catch the drift of coworkers' gossip.  We later moved on to a study of the phonetic characters, which proceeded something like this:

"ㄅ ("bugh")," my wife intoned.

"Boo," I repeated.

"No, not like that," she corrected.  "And keep your tone the same.  Don't go up or down.  Try again - ㄅ."

"ㄅ," I imitated, but with my voice rising at the end.

"No that's wrong," she said, "But much better."

...and so on, until I could put the phonetic characters together.  ㄅ and ㄤ for "bang," ㄌ and ㄢ for "lan," ㄉ and ㄧ and ㄥ for "ding."  It was slow going, but I began to feel like I finally had a way into the language.  It wasn't all random noise.

Yet the tones were still tripping me up every time.  We moved onto storybooks similar to the alphabet primers seen in the States, wherein each phonetic character was used to introduce a Chinese word.

"Shr," I read aloud from the book, keeping my tone even, then: "Shrou."  Then the falling/rising tone next to the phonetic characters, "Shr... ou... 手.... tao?"

"No, that's still not right," my wife corrected gently, "It's 手套.  The second tone is falling."

This, after a half hour of fighting the book, and of making my mouth form unfamiliar sounds.  I felt like the Chinese word for "gloves" was mocking me.  I felt like I would never learn Chinese.  I felt stupid.  I felt hurt.

"FUCK!" I yelled at the wall, throwing the book across the room.  Why did Chinese have to be so hard?  Why couldn't my mouth - and my brain - work the way I wanted them to?  It wasn't for lack of effort on my part.  I'd set myself a schedule, and I'd stuck by it for months.  An hour of practice after work, every day.  

My wife did her best to console me.  Of course it was hard for her to understand.  She'd begun her study of English at a very early age, and in the midst of Chinese speakers.  Her learning curve had been a lot shallower than mine, and her earliest years of English study were a distant memory.

Goddamn 手套.  I started to hate that word.  Every time I had to use it I grew incredibly self-conscious.  It didn't help that everyone I worked with knew that I was trying to learn Chinese, and that they corrected me at every opportunity.  They were quite relentless about it.  The pressure was at times intense.

"Maybe you can go to the university and take a class?" my wife suggested.

I thought it over and it seemed like a good idea.  It also occurred to me that my wife and I might be going about things the wrong way, and that university professors with years of experience might just know a little more about learning and teaching Chinese than we did.  A short time later I was enrolled in a Chinese class at Tung Hai University 東海大學, which was only a short distance from where we lived.

"亞當先生 ("Mr. Adam")," said my instructor on our first day of class, "念這個字給我們聽 ("Read this word aloud for us.")

"Shr," I said.

"Ou," I added.

"手," I carefully pronounced, seeing the tonal marker.

"Te," I continued.

"Ao," I said.

"套." I affirmed, with a falling tone.

"很好 ("Very good.")," said the instructor, and the lesson continued on.  I listened to my classmates struggle with the same words I had been struggling with for months, and though they had my sympathies, I was glad to know I was pronouncing things better and more consistently than they were.  Towards the end of my first semester the teacher was even using me for a model, asking the other students to speak words as I did.

And I can't lie.  It felt awesome.  Before long we were writing characters, and I could read bits of signs on the road.  I learned the names of foods, and I could order different things in restaurants.  I started to understand snippets of what my kindergartners were saying in school, and I could use Chinese as a shortcut to help them understand certain English words.  Taiwan was like a book that was opening up before me, and after each day's study I understood a little more of what that book contained.

Chinese New Year arrived, and after completing my first semester at the university we were in front of our apartment, about to drive our scooter to the train station.

"It's cold today," said my wife.

"Yes," I answered, "We should put on our 手套."

9. What's Going in Taitung City and County Townships/Municipalities 台東市,鄉,鎮最近動向 4 (June 2018)

For those less familiar with Taiwan, the "big" cities are divided into districts (區), and the counties are divided into cities (市), townships (鄉), and municipalities (鎮).  給對台灣比較不熟悉的讀者,  大城市 (高雄, 台南, 台中, 新竹, 基隆, 嘉義, 台北, 跟新北市) 以下有"區"的劃分, 縣 (城市外的地方)則由市, 鄉, 鎮組成.

I also scanned through the news for any interesting news items relevant to the township and municipalities below.  There isn't a lot of Taitung-related news in the best of times, but I did my best to find relevant articles. 我也看了最近的新聞, 希望找到與這些城鎮相關的有趣的報導.  我盡力了, 只是台東的新聞不多.

This will be the last news entry for a while.  Summer vacation is only two weeks away!  關於新聞的文章這將是這學期的最後一篇.  暑假快到了.

1. Da Ren Township 達仁鄉公所

Rao Jing-ling, the KMT's candidate for Taitung County Magistrate, recently made it down to Da Ren to talk about development plans there.  台東縣國民黨縣長提名候選人饒慶鈴去達仁鄉討論那邊的發展計畫.

I'm not really sure why this is news, but apparently a pair of "husband and wife trees" in Nan Tian Village are still standing, even though they died ten years ago.  我不知道這件事怎麼會在新聞出現, 可是南田村有十年前枯死的夫妻樹還沒倒.

2. Da Wu Township 大武鄉公所

The Da Wu Township Office brought several farmers growing red quinoa plants to Pingtung County to learn more about growing these plants.  大武鄉公所帶幾個紅藜農民去屏東縣汲取當地的經驗.*

3. Jin Feng Township 金峰鄉公所

Jia Lan Community in Jin Feng Township recently won an award for environmental education.  金峰鄉的嘉蘭社區最近獲環境教育的優等獎.

4. Tai Ma Li Township 太麻里鄉公所

Looking for something new to do in Tai Ma Li?  You can visit the "hydrangea tunnel!"  在太麻里找新的景點嗎?  可以去繡球花隧道!

5. Orchid Island Township 蘭嶼鄉公所

Metal doors, used to keep out wild pigs, are becoming part of Orchid Island's local culture.  蘭嶼農地都裝上門窗, 成了蘭嶼特別景觀.

The Orchid Island took place on June 3.  From the looks of the picture, not a lot of people went.  六月三日蘭嶼舉辦馬拉松.  從照片來看, 選手不多.

With a little funding from a well known bank, junior high school students on Orchid Island now have a baseball team.  因為銀行的協助, 蘭嶼的中學棒球隊正式成立了.

Boat service was suspended on Orchid Island due to big waves.  蘭嶼有大浪, 交通輪停駛.

6. Green Island Township 綠島鄉公所

Due to adverse weather conditions, Green Island's "underwater mailbox" was taken out of service for a week.  因為天氣的關係, 綠島的海底郵筒 "停班停課" 一個星期了.

7. Taitung City 台東市公所

In part to celebrate Dragon Boat Festival, the Taitung City Office and the Central Market were selling 10 NT boxes of eggs on June 10.  為了慶祝端午節, 十日的時候台東市公所跟中央市場賣10元的蛋盒.

The Taitung City Office's team came in first in the "Slow-pitch Magistrate Cup."  台東市公所的慢速壘球隊在 "市長盃" 得到第一名.

The City Office is promoting several "Makapahay" festivals in accordance with local aboriginal harvest festivals.  配合聯合豐年祭, 台東市公所推出馬卡巴嗨系列活動.


People have been shopping the tops off of trees in anticipation of heavy rains.  因為颱風季來臨的關係台東市又見斷頭樹.

8. Beinan Township 卑南鄉公所

There was a fire in an aluminum shack in Beinan.  A man resident in the shack was killed.  卑南的鐵皮屋發生大火, 一男子喪命.

There's a new bridge open in Tai An Village, Beinan Township.  卑南鄉泰安村的新橋通車.

A team of rescue volunteers came together in Jer Ben's hot spring area.  Typhoon damage in that area is a real problem.  重機具搶救班及志工隊在知本溫泉區成立.  那邊受颱風的影響很大.

9. Dong He Township 東河鄉公所

The artificial nature of most rivers/streams in Taiwan poses an obstacle for wildlife.  A reporter climbed down into a river in Dong He and had a hard time getting out.  台灣河床蓋上水泥溝造物會影響到河床附近的野生動物.  有一位記者下去東河的一條小溪, 他要從河床爬上來都很困難.

10. Cheng Gong Municipality 成功鎮公所


The Taitung County Government is encouraging fishermen not to place the day's catch on the pavement for reasons of hygiene.  台東縣政府教導漁民不要把魚丟在地上, 因為這個習慣不衛生.

Would you like a nice, hot run?  You can sign up for the San Shian Tai Marathon now!  你想在很熱的地方跑步嗎?  現在可以報名三仙台馬拉松.

A surfer disappeared in the water up in Duli.  They still haven't found him.  衝浪客在都歷海灘失蹤.  他們還是找不到人.

11. Chang Bin Township 長濱鄉公所

There's a list of Chang Bin's aboriginal harvest festivals here.  They all occur in July.  這個網頁有長濱的豐年祭活動期程表.  所有的活動在七月舉辦.

Some guy was caught in Chang Bin with a fake gun.  It scared people.  They called the police!  長濱一位男子有假槍.  那邊的人嚇一跳趕緊報案.

12. Lu Ye Township 鹿野鄉公所


Pineapples are going for as little as 10 NT now.  This is causing problems for farmers in Lu Ye.  現在買一顆鳳梨只要10元.  造成農民的損失.

The hot air balloon festival is in full swing.  You might want to avoid Gao Tai on the weekends.  熱氣球嘉年華來了.  周末的時候大概要避免去高台了.

13. Yan Ping Township 延平鄉公所

There will be an aboriginal archery competition in Yan Ping on July 8.  七月八日延平舉辦原住民傳統弓箭射箭比賽.**

The Yan Ping Township Office wants to use the old Yung Kang Police Station as an exhibition center for agricultural products.  延平鄉公所要把以前的永康派出所改建成一處農產展示中心.

14. Guanshan Municipality 關山鎮公所

As way of promoting "rice tamale (zongzi) culture," a rice tamale activity was held in De Gao Community.  為了推廣米粽文化德高社區舉辦包粽體驗.***

"Fake honey!"  It may surprise you to know that fake versions of Guanshan honey have appeared online.  假的蜂蜜!  你大概沒聽過網上有出現盜版的關山蜂蜜.

15. Hai Duan Township 海端鄉公所

A truck hit a tree on highway 20, killing the driver.  台20線有車撞到一棵樹造成司機死亡.

There was also a rockslide along highway 20.  That road is dangerous.  台20線也有落石.  那條路很危險.

16. Chr Shang Township 池上鄉公所

Several junior high school students took part in a rite of manhood ceremony at a local temple.  池上應屆畢業國中生在當地的玉清宮參加成年禮儀式.

A hot air balloon demonstration was held at Fu Yuan Elementary School for graduation students.  為了鼓勵畢業生, 福原國小舉行熱氣球展球活動.

10. Assorted Thoughts at the End of the Semester (June 2018)

Grade 6 Graduation Ceremonies

I have a hard time with these.  I know some of the kids and their parents love this tradition, but as an American I have a difficult time understanding it.  Back when I finished elementary school, my teacher shook my hand and said, "Have a good summer."  That was it.  

In the Taiwanese elementary school where I work however, we suffer through a two-hour long graduation extravaganza, complete with awards, solemn speeches by local dignitaries, and tear-jerking Powerpoint presentations.  It's all so ridiculously overblown, and by the end of it I always feel slightly nauseous.

Retirement Ceremonies

Speaking of graduation ceremonies, tomorrow afternoon we also have a retirement ceremony for both the school principal and one of the first grade teachers.  This is where I get to see coworkers cry, and I dislike it even more than the graduation ceremony.  People say the fakest things during these events, and by the end of it I always wonder how anyone can possibly cry over someone they've barely spoken to in the last several decades.  I like the two coworkers who are retiring, but these manufactured displays of emotion really bother me.

The World Cup

I know the odds are against me, but I'm rooting for Mexico.  I always root for Mexico.  I didn't see the Spain-Portugal game - which I heard was awesome - but I truly enjoyed the Mexico-Germany match.  Mexico's win also negated the money already owed to a friend from another game, so I haven't lost any money on the World Cup yet.  Mexico will likely beat South Korea this Friday, and that win should put them in the next round of games.

English Summer Camps

We're doing one in Hot Spring Elementary this year.  The schedule's a done deal - basically a repeat of what we did last winter - and the whole thing should go fairly smoothly.  The only hitch will be the weather.  If it's hot we'll need to worry about the outside portions of the camp.  If it's rainy we'll have to improvise other activities.  Whatever happens, it's likely to be a sweaty three days.

Bali

My wife, my younger daughter and I are going to Bali for two weeks at the end of July.  I've never been to Bali (or anywhere else in Indonesia) before, but I'm expecting a fairly tourist-friendly environment.  I really don't want to plan for this trip.  I'd like to keep what we do there as open and relaxed as possible.

Other Places

I'd really like to get to the Matsu Islands sometime this summer.  I want to go there even more than Indonesia.  It seems like an odd destination, and I don't know anyone who's been there.  I'm not 100% sure I can make it over, but I'm sure going to try.

Next School Year

Did you know that the next school year will be my ELEVENTH in this school?  Yes, I've been teaching here for a solid decade without interruption.  That's life I guess.  Ten years seems like a long time when you're viewing it from the other side of 2008, but in 2018 I can't believe how fast it all went by.

Speeches in Taipei

After I get back from Bali I'll be giving a presentation to the incoming Foreign English Teachers (FETs) in Taipei.  The topic I was given is "Classroom Management and Co-Teaching Strategies."  The money's nice, but left to my own devices I probably would've chosen a different topic.  I already have the schedule for the FET Orientation, and it is unrelentingly serious.  I'm sure the people in Taipei would disagree with me, but I think an almost solid day of lesson plans and associated academic exercises would fry anyone's brain.

Fight!

Two of my friends almost go into a fight last weekend.  What is it about tequila?  Someone drinks it, hears a mostly harmless comment, and the next thing you know a fight is about to happen.

Fancy Food

Finally ate at the Gaya Hotel last weekend, and man did we get FANCY.  With the aid of meal tickets, all four of us ordered the steak meal, priced at 1080 NT a person.  I even ordered a glass of wine.  Was it worth the money?  Well, I'm not a big eater of steak in the best of times, and we weren't always able to identify what we were eating.  I'd like to tell you it was awesome, but I'm still not sure?

Big Asses

I have this friend whose wife hails from a country other than Taiwan.  Often we'll get beers, and he'll start in on how women here "have no asses."  I think such talk is unfair to the women of Taiwan, and overlooks an important social reality.  Plenty of women in Taiwan have what Western men would think of as a "great ass," but 9 out of 10 aren't putting their backsides on public display.  

Why?  Because it's not part of the local idea of beauty.  Check out any fashion magazine or TV show.  Peruse one of the men's magazines on local newsstands - very few big bums.  Taiwanese women with that particular feature aren't usually the ones wearing tight pants and short skirts; more often than not they're concealing it rather than showing it off.

People Who Can't Hold Their Liquor

Have you met one of these people that switch personalities after the third or fourth beer?  That gets weird.  I don't know about you, but I tend to get mellower the more I drink, and the reverse has almost never happened.  If you're the kind of person who turns into the Hulk after three beers, you might consider the fact that you have some emotional shit you need to work out, and that drinking is not a good way of approaching that problem.

Speaking of Liquor...

Whatever happened to that TTL leechee wine they used to sell everywhere?  I loved that stuff.

Reddit

I've been using Reddit a lot more lately.  I've been using it for years off and on, but I'm only now begining to understand the advantages of Reddit over other online platforms.  I still use Messenger quite a bit, but I (still) have the feeling that Facebook proper is dying a slow death.  If you're looking for another online community about Taiwan, you might check out r/Taiwan.

Cheese Sticks

Still no cheese sticks at Sam's Burger.  I heard (somewhere) that the root cause was Costco not selling them anymore.  Apparently most of the restaurants in Taiwan selling cheese sticks were buying them there.  The foreign community has been struck particularly hard by this dearth of cheese sticks, and hopefully this cheese stick shortage crisis can be resolved in the near future.

What I'd Do If I Wasn't at Work

I'd take another nap, because the one I tried to have in the back room behind the Curriculum Office just wasn't happening.  After that I'd probably watch a movie.  I have a movie at home, In Bruges, which I've heard is pretty good.

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